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What do we think we know about teenaged fathers?
If we’re honest, most of us would have to admit we have assumptions and beliefs, but little in the way of real knowledge about young fathers. Anybody who wants to actually know about men who become dads in their teens – how they see themselves, the challenges they face, and how they feel about their children -- should watch Believe in me!/Je suis là!. This new DVD chronicles the work of FIRA’s Young Fathers Cluster, led by Annie Devault, professor of social work at the Université du Québec en Outaouais.
Believe in me!/Je suis là! is the first Canadian film to provide a window into the lives and, more importantly, the minds of a group of young dads. The 26-minute documentary, made by Tamás Wormser, of Artesian Films, gives young fathers a voice: a chance to talk about their aspirations, their frustrations, their mistakes, their pride in the children and also the enormous obstacles they face if they want to be involved in their children’s lives.
Obstacles include everything from the young men’s own mistakes, lack of education, unpreparedness to assume the role of father, their low status in the eyes of the courts and the child protection system, and the circumstances they grew up in. Some of the men speak of growing up without a father, of parents who were not always there for them. In some cases it becomes clear that early parenthood goes back several generations in certain families. But most of all, the young men talk about how many people and societal institutions don’t even consider the possibility that they could ever play a positive role in their children’s development.
Some young fathers surmount these obstacles over time. One father interviewed in the film, became a dad when he was only 14. This young man is now 27, the father of four, two of whom live with him full-time, and working as a security guard. He and the other fathers talk about the happiness they derive from their connection with their children. One says that helping his daughter to walk and teaching her new words made him feel good about himself. From the way he talks about it, it’s clear that this young man has spent much of his life not feeling good about himself. As Chapman Uko, who first established the Ottawa Young Father’s program, where much of the film’s footage was shot explains, “These young men have never been made to feel that they are competent at anything.”
Another father, talked about how hard it was to even contemplate doing all the things he needs to do to get his life together so he will be allowed to see his daughter more frequently. He wonders how any authority could see him as fit to care for a child when he’s attending an all-adult high school, working for minimum wage and living in a rooming house.
But as the title suggests, “Believe in me!” is the young fathers’ main underlying message, even though none of them say those specific words. Believe in me!/Je suis là! forces the viewer to confront his or her own assumptions. Do we simply write young fathers off? Or do we give them a chance to show us what they can accomplish? And how do we think young men will become responsible parents if we don’t provide them with the supports and services available to young mothers?
Believe in me!/Je suis là! is an essential resource to anyone who works with young fathers or young mothers.
Believe in me!/Je suis là!
Produced by Artesian Films and the Young Fathers Cluster of the Father Involvement Research Alliance
26 minutes, DVD, English and French language subtitled versions on the same DVD
This DVD is not for sale. Limited single copies are available from the organizations listed below for a nominal fee of $10.00 to cover shipping and handling.
Father Involvement Initiative – Ontario Network www.cfii.ca/fiion/(click on Materials from a drop-down menu under resources)
Vanier Institute of the Family –
By email: llegault@vifamily.ca;
Fax: 613-228-8007;
Mail: The Vanier Institute of the Family, 94 Centrepointe Drive, Ottawa,
ON K2G 6B1.
Father Involvement Research Alliance www.fira.uoguelph.ca
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FIRA researcher Andrea Doucet, a professor of sociology at Carleton University and co-leader of FIRA’s New Fathers cluster, has been awarded the John Porter Tradition of Excellence Book Award for her book Do Men Mother?. This award was established in 1980 by the Canadian Sociology and Anthropology Association in memory of John Porter, the eminent Canadian sociologist, best known for his book The Vertical Mosaic: An Analysis of Social Class and Power in Canada.
Works nominated for the Porter Award must reflect solid theory, meticulous research, make a distinguished sociological or anthropological contribution to the understanding of Canadian society and also be written in language that can be understood by the intelligent lay person.
Do Men Mother? Fathering Care and Domestic Responsibility (2006, University of Toronto Press), based on Doucet’s study of primary-caregiver Canadian fathers, examines and analyzes the experiences of men who are taking on the child-rearing responsibility that has traditionally been shouldered by women. Dr. Scott Coltrane, of the Center for Family Studies at the University of California, Riverside, called it “the best thing I have read on men in families in a decade.” Apparently Doucet’s Canadian colleagues agree.
Doucet has also been awarded the Thérèse F. Casgrain Fellowship by the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council. This fellowship, named for the noted Quebec feminist activist and politician who died in 1981, supports research in the field of social justice, particularly in defence of individual rights and the promotion of the economic and social interests of Canadian women.
Doucet will use this funding to support her study of primary breadwinner mothers. “Statistics Canada data show that women are the primary earners– that is they have a higher income than their partners – in 30 percent of Canadian dual-earner families,” says Doucet. “I want to find out how women, who have traditionally held the weight of domestic responsibilities, do when they are also responsible for bread-winning.” In her research, Doucet will get the perspectives of a diverse group of women who are the primary earners in their families and also examine policies and programs that support these women and their partners, who often must adopt a very active fathering role. She will also look at policies and experience in other national contexts (France, Sweden, the U.S. and the U.K. ) as they affect the issue of maternal breadwinners. The end product of her research will be another academic book, which will make a fitting and complementary follow-up to Do Men Mother?
Toronto’s LGBTQ Parenting Network and Queer Parenting Programmes at the 519 Church St. Community Centre have produced a series of brochures for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Trans parents. One of these brochures, Parenting Options for Gay/Bi/Queer Men is designed to assist non-heterosexual men who are considering parenthood. The brochure covers options such as public, private and international adoption, co--parenting with women, and surrogacy. Also included is a list of Toronto-based resources and broader web links. To order brochures contact Rachel Epstein, Coordinator, LGBTQ Parenting Network(416) 324-4100 ext. 5219
Parentingnetwork@sherbourne.on.ca
Click here for a pdf version of the brochure:
For information about Queer Parenting Programmes at the 519, click here.
The LGBTQ Parenting Network is supported by a partnership of The Sherbourne Health Centre, 519 Church St. Community Centre and Family Services Association of Toronto.
For information: www.fsatoronto.com/programs/lgbtparenting.html
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